An Inhuman Condition

Stop lamenting all the ways you suck. Stop wishing you were productive. Stop wanting things you don’t need. Stop doing things that don’t matter. Stop putting things off until you “have more time.” You waste plenty of time already.

Don’t take it personally, don’t get depressed. Just do better.

The more you sit around and lament whatever wishing and dreaming of a better world (better you, better circumstances, better anything), you could be doing it. You do it by doing better. Contemplation is great if you’re going forward, but thinking about the past is only backward motion. You can’t change anything there. You are powerless in the past, but you are Superman now and in the future. There are so many things you can change right now that make all of the things you can’t change look meaningless. Learn from your mistakes and do better. Don’t plan, don’t schedule, don’t make a mental note or procrastinate on it. You will lose it if you don’t start now. Just do better. Tattoo that thought on your mind and don’t forget. Do it now.

Do better.

Keep calm; carry on.

If you aren’t up for the extremes of death through failure and death through success, I have the perfect answer for you. There is definitely a way to kill yourself with mediocrity. It’s more of a long-term commitment than the other two, but it doesn’t require a whole lot of work. This is the option most appealing to my sample group, and it could be a great fit for anyone.

Do you lack (or have you given up) any real dreams or aspirations? Do you play video games all day? Are you in your mid-twenties and still living with your parents? Are you stuck in a relationship heading nowhere but content to stay because it’s comfy? Have you been working the same shitty job or type of job for more than five years? Are you starting a family? Are you a college graduate making less than $20k a year? Are you just shuffling along day after day? Are you pushing forward in a career or field of study that doesn’t make your dick (or clit) hard? Are you letting bills, rent, obligations keep you from the things you really want?

Then this is the method for you.

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Burn out; fade away.

If that doesn’t work for you, there’s always the opposite. I’m old enough to see the dangers of the folks who choose to grow up too much. There’s always the chance they get lost in it and become this thing they didn’t want. Wearing the biz-casual khakipants or necktie every day can just wear a person down to the point of being a homogenous office jockey. They start to think the career is everything. They fail at being social outside of work; they get the marriage and 2.5 children, and they fade away.

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Live fast; die young.

I’m realizing there’s a definite stage of development for any former “rock and roll” youth type where one of two things happen: you grow up or fuck up. This division seems to happen anywhere between 18 and 25, but it always happens. It’s been odd on this side of things – seeing people wasting away working at Burger King, still sniffing glue, spending every dime getting hammered or worse. It’s sad. These were my peers growing up. We fucked off and got fucked up. We did some seriously stupid shit, and some of us got over it. Some of us didn’t live long enough to get over it.

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